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Home arrow Road Monkey - Europe 98
Giving a Continental
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Pootown!

Make the Sign of the Cow & Go Moo
Vienna stank of horseshit and Amsterdam smelt like a urinal. There ended the travelogue. The cab driver shut the fuck up.
Read More>>		 We soon arrived at our day trip destination of Lake Lucerne and the guide departed with the bus presumably to address the local Hitler Youth Rally or blow away a few hippies with his Glock.
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The Silver Pterrodactyl

Flying the Coupe

Alitalia Airlines to London via Bangkok and Rome. Hosties in Milan fashion and cigarette smoke wafting back through the feeble curtain that serves as the demarcation between the faggers and the fagged off. The last airline on the planet to ban in flight smoking chugged on oblivious - A silver Pterodactyl straight from the Jurassic.
Read More>		 As I took in its grandeur I pondered the most fitting narrative for us entering this cultural icon of a city. I feared that Edgar Allan Poe’s “Murders in the Rue Morgue” to perhaps be more likely than any burlesque fantasy.
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Ah Vienna!

Polanski's Vampires
At the Hotel-Pension Corvinus fat people obviously took the stairs. The elevator is tiny. Even without luggage there is barely enough room inside for two to stand comfortably, let alone a couple repelling each other like flipped magnets.
Read More>		 Inside the light explodes through stained glass one minute and then casts dark shadows the next. It was magnificent and had rung in over 900 Christmases. It was one of the most ancient edifices I would encounter at least till the drag queens of Amsterdam.
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Trapped with the Von Trapps

Praha-dy Ha Ha
However the tour spots were picturesque and occasionally I could imagine a troupe of smart arse boys and jailbait girls in white dresses skipping along with Julie Andrews if I remembered hard.
Read More>		 The metaphorical elephant that had been sharing our hotel rooms since London finally impaled itself on a tusk and quietly bled to death in a corner.
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Nuremberg Whistle Stop

In Search of the Far Canal
One was Dusseldorf where a few weeks previously during renovations of the local soccer stadium an unexploded allied bomb was found underneath the goal at one end. It certainly would have brought some spice to a dull nil all draw if that one had gone off in injury time.
Read More>		 Fuelled by vivid imagination or perhaps some coffee shop herbs it was easy to stereotype every good looking young person as a porno star, every ugly sole a drug dealer and the old as hiding some secret perversion. Of course this was profoundly unfair as some of the ugly and old were also probably porno stars.
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